Regress

It’s just that all I want to do is regress/ all I want to do is watch Mr. Rogers, watch Reading Rainbow, watch every Jim Henson muppet extravaganza ever made and just/ ignore the fact that life is suffering life is stress life is / continuous and failed attempts to heal and move on/ so here I am on the couch again and again and again /and some might label this depression and some/ might label this common sense in a society that does not offer us much /does not care for us much/ we adults we grown ups we ones who are supposed to be somehow able to deal and cope and take charge/ of things but the things we are supposed to take charge of are tarnished and tainted and dirty and broken and ruined and garbage and why/ can’t we be asked to be the next Mr. Rogers why can’t we be in charge of reading rainbows and rainbows and rainbows/ of books to children and to each other/ why can’t we be handed things that are calming and pleasant and wholesome/ and uplifting as muppets and puppets telling stories and teaching lessons why is this not seen as being /strong why is this not seen as being grown/ we are given things that are shallow and empty and told that we can drink/ we are given things that are rotten and toxic and told that we can gamble/ we are given things that are painful and harmful and we are told this is normal and considered fun for those old enough/ to somehow no longer have to worry about being decent people/ to somehow wax nostalgic over Mr. Rogers being held by Koko the Gorilla but then brush it off and push on in this culture of sexism and violence and racism and bullying/ in this culture of grown men acting like toddlers and fools all day long but without the element of innocence /without the element of curiosity and desire to learn and grow and change / we watch them run governments/ we watch them run companies/ we watch them try to relate to us/  we watch them exploit and exploit/ and then we cannot take it anymore we retreat into the fact that most of us right now/ could not bounce back from a 400 dollar emergency expense/ that most of us right now could not see a doctor if we were sick/ that most of us right now are deleting student loan default emails fingers hitting the keys like gunshots in an old time western film /most of us right now are eating plastics drinking plastics filled with plastics /while society laughs at kids trying to stop climate change from killing off their lives and dreams and bodies and futures and /we just curl up get fatter get fatter// weighed down with this culture /that does not do anyone any good /does not say hey here’s compassion and kindness and emotional maturity /and here’s healthy ways to have feelings/ and here’s healthy ways to be in relationship /and here’s healthy ways to be in bodies so /we regress, I regress, /it’s muppets all day it’s stories /that offer a return/ to the womb of hope/ where fuzzy images offer us a vision of adults putting their feet in a tiny backyard pool celebrating peace, diversity, advocating for justice, where/ adults dressed as big birds and pulling the strings guide the way towards learning to share, learning to care, being a good friend, where/ adults explore the world and the possibilities of all good things in this life by taking a look it’s in a book and sharing this goodness with children whose eyes /sparkled with the glow of inheriting this amazing world/ that adults forgot to tell us never really existed but hoped in their yearning and longing way we would try for it anyway. 

©Jenny Justice. All Rights Reserved. 

Jenny Justice, Poet. Author of Love in the Time of Climate Change and Reveal. You can read more of her poetry at Justice Poetic.Sign up for her newsletter here.